I was and still am a screamer, literally….I used to lead the school band in middle school. I used to be the person who had to twirl the baton, flip it, throw it in the air and catch it..of course it was not my innate ability to flip a stick without it flying and bonking some poor fellow’s eye that got me the job, it was my ability to scream out loud and clear instructions on what the band had to play next..like say National Anthem or welcome song or a whole lot of other commands I forget now..The band was successful for a couple of years before I moved on to better things like leading a girl guides marching band. It was a huge change, I still had to scream, but these were more mundane instructions like right, left, attention, and so on. I haven’t done that much screaming for a while now, except maybe to remind the dude for the hundredth time that wet towels belong in the bathroom and not on the bed. I had almost forgotten that part of my life until a few days back, when the implet let out the most blood curdling scream I had heard. Pots and pans were dropped, chairs clattered and arms and legs tumbled down the stairs to get to the play mat to see him all gurgling and cooing. I lifted him, examined him, peeped into his diaper to check for gold deposits. He was fine, absolutely contented. It took a few more of those screams to realize, he just loves his own voice..Hey!! The vanity is not from my side of the family. He lies on his back, stiffens his legs, arms straight out and screams and them smiles as if he has conquered the next village. It is a riot, once you get used to it of course. He is also learning to crawl too..It is almost inspiring to watch him, go on all fours, flop back, try again. The is something about the resilience of babies that belies their outward fragility. It is thought provoking too, I mean all of us have passed that age..we were that determined to do things, to move ahead, to learn new things, to conquer no matter what our bodies tell us, no matter how bleak the outlook was…so where did all of that go, I mean did we say that is it once we started to walk.
It has made me take myself less seriously, made me stop analyzing every little thing and just get up. There are times when I feel my knees are not strong enough or maybe my hand will give away, all I have to do then is to remind myself, if I don’t do this, I may never learn to walk..